friendly – Jim Gallagher

1 Samuel 18:1

“Now when he had finished speaking to Saul, the soul of Jonathan was knit to the soul of David, and Jonathan loved him as his own soul.”

The relationship between David and Jonathan is one of the most beautiful and encouraging in all of Scripture. We find that these two young men met while serving the Lord and furthering His kingdom. Their relationship was built on love, humility, and self-sacrifice. It was this relationship that proved to be a constant source of encouragement to David, and a means by which Jonathan learned to discover God’s plan for his life.

Friendships are essential to a healthy Christian life. Solomon wrote,

Proverbs 12:26

“The righteous should choose his friends carefully, for the way of the wicked leads them astray.”

Proverbs 27:17

“As iron sharpens iron, so a man sharpens the countenance of his friend.”

David’s life was greatly enhanced by the relationship he forged with Jonathan. Like a knife being rubbed against steel, David’s character was sharpened by Jonathan. The jealous rage of king Saul often beat upon David’s countenance, and it was Jonathan who encouraged and strengthen him. In one of the more revealing passages we read,

1 Samuel 23:16

“Then Jonathan, Saul’s son, arose and went to David in the woods and strengthened his hand in God.”

Jonathan did this by simply visiting his friend in time of need, and reminding him of the promises of God. This provided David with hope and strength to continue in that which God had called him.

We would all be better off with a friend like Jonathan, but it is important to keep a few things in mind. First, David and Jonathan met while serving the Lord. The best and healthiest relationships are the ones forged in the service of Christ. The more we dive into “Kingdom work,” the more likely we are to meet others who will provide encouragement to help us keep on with Christ. Second, in a very practical passage, Solomon gives the following advice,

Proverbs 18:24

“A man who has friends must himself be friendly…”

The secret to establishing good relationships, is to seek to be the friend you desire others to be. We all want a Jonathan in our lives, but perhaps a better approach is to seek to be a Jonathan in the life of others. He laid his life down, and sought to encourage David to become all God had called him to be.

Pastor Jim

Proverbs 18:24
“A man who has friends must himself be friendly,
But there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.”

Friendship is one of the most important parts of life. We were not designed to live in isolation or face all the struggles of life alone. We have some wonderful examples of friendship in Scripture. We are told that when Jonathan met David, he loved him as his own soul. He expressed this love by taking his armor and giving it to David (1 Samuel 18:4). As the son of the king, this action showed he believed David was chosen, by God, to reign in the land. From that time forward, Jonathan lived to encourage David to be the man God had called him to be. His actions illustrate Paul’s words to to the Philippians.

Philippians 2:3
“Let nothing be done through selfish ambition or conceit, but in lowliness of mind let each esteem others better than himself.”

Barnabas, in the New Testament, is also a great example of friendship. When Saul of Tarsus first met Christ, no other Christian would have anything to do with him. The church basically thought his conversion was an elaborate ploy to get close to Christians, in order to imprison or kill them. It was Barnabas who risked it all and befriended Paul. After meeting with him and seeing he had, in fact, given his life to Christ, Barnabas stood up for Paul to the other church leaders (Acts 9:26-27). Later, Paul was given opportunity to serve the Lord alongside Barnabas.

Both of these examples reveal the benefit of godly friendships. All of us long to have someone in our lives who would act like a Barnabas or a Jonathan. Solomon gives a practical tip as to how to develop and keep godly friendships. He writes,

“A man who has friends must himself be friendly,
But there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.”

If we desire friendship, we must be friendly. Instead of looking for someone who will come alongside and support us, we should be looking for those whom we can come alongside and support. One of the simplest ways to do this is at church. It is not uncommon for people to enter a church, sit by themselves, and leave without ever making contact with any other believers. After weeks and weeks of this, they may start to think the church is an unfriendly place, because no one has reached out and befriended them. While that may be true, it is equally true, they have not reached out to anyone else. One of the best ways to establish friendship, is to look for someone who is sitting alone and join them. Ask them if they want to grab a coffee or get a meal after church. I am not suggesting you use the church as a place to get a date, but as a place where you can establish godly friendships, which will help you walk with the Lord. instead of looking for someone to be the friend you need, look to be the friend someone else needs.

Pastor Jim